A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

Knock knock Go away

A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Knock knock! Who's there? IT DOESN'T MATTER, YOU'RE NOT COMING TO MY HOUSE!!!! *closes door*

Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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