Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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Your sex life.

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What did the jew say to the black man? Nothing they were in a mall that got invaded by evil trees.

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What did all of the blind children sing on the bus ride? Nothing because they drove off a cliff

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What did Batman say when he saw Robin? Hey look it's Robin

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#Getweird

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Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

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knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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