Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

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hi dave

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

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I used to be an adventurer like you but then i grew old and i never took i single injury unlike my brother he took an arrow to the knee or so he says i asked him to show me and he was all defensive like "whoa man i don't need to prove anything." so i think he's lieing

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Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the kangaroo fall over? Because it fell over the dead koala

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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A black man walks in to a bar and say ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

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What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

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Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

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I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

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identical jokes get different votes.

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What was Tiger (from Whinnie the Pooh) looking for in the toilet? Pooh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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