Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take your fott off his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

thumb_up thumb_down +39

there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Whais red and bad for your teeth? a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down +37

If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +35

ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops