One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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irish man drinking john smiths

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

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A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Nothing. He can't talk, just makes awful noises and hand gestures.

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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You killed my brother and call me the antichrist? Its lovable: Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the **** are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming? He died for their sins, not for yours... WELCOME TO HELL!

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Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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Half life 3 confirmed

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

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darude- sandstorm

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What is the best thing about dating a slut? You can return her at Build-a-Hoe Workshop.

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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Q: Why is the sky green? A: It's not

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Mohamed is driving a taxi to the airport at 20mph How many pounds of explosives are strapped to his chest?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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