How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

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Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

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What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

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How did the guy who's been in his mothers basement for 20 years lose his virginity? He didn't, that's where his mother hid his body.

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Why did we invade Afghanistan? Because we hate arabs.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

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A train poops its pants.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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CHORGLUND

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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