Cat ate a battery, did volts.

What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue If you need a poo.... ...hold it in.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

Why did Brooke go to the bathroom? She had to pee

What did the black man say to his wife on valentines day? - You are fat

snowglobe

You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Julian Ha.

Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

What do you call a baked bean falling from 10,000 feet? A baked bean

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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