What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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What/s funnier than 24 dead Jews? 25 dead Jews. What/s funnier than 25 dead Jews? 6 million dead Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

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cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

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What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

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What's red, blue & green all over?

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Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

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What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

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Obese penguin. It died of a heart attack.

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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what's brown and sticky? A Stick

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops