Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

why did the movie get bad reviews? it was a bad movie

What's the main difference between dogs and children? When children reach their teen years they grow up and leave home. When dogs reach their teen years they die of old age.

What did the black man say to his wife on valentines day? - You are fat

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

What do you call a baked bean falling from 10,000 feet? A baked bean

Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

Julian Ha.

How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

Women can vote? WTF

You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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