why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

Why did the black man repeatedly punch the white man? The two men were boxers. They were fighting in a charity boxing match. Revenue generated by the event went towards cancer research.

Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

What the hell are you doing?

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

who looks like justin bieber and is really cool? george darling but i lied about him being cool.

How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

Why was six afraid of seven? Back in middle school, they were both friends. They hung out every day and always had the best fun. It wasn't until their baseball team made it to the junior championship. That was when seven started doping for better strength and endurance for the game. Sevens family and friends (Especially six,) Had started to notice a change in sevens behavior and he seemed more distant from any social relationships with others. Seven began to become angry and self centered and only seemed to be focused on the game. Seven found out that Six knew that he was doping and fought him and brutally injured Six. Seven was then found out by the coaches and was kicked off the team. Seven, knowing that he had ruined his whole life, Shot himself with his dads .38 Revolver.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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