why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

If I have 12 backpacks and Jimmy has 91 pancakes, then how many marshmallows can cover the roof of this building? Purple. Because Aliens don't wear hats.

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...