why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

Your wife died during the delivery.

What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

Why did the blind man have a poo Because he needed one.

Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

What is green fuzzy and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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