Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Agent 47.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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Yo mama is so short, she has trouble reaching the top shelf.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

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I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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What's the difference between a zit and a priest? These two things are so different that I couldn't list all of the differences in this text box.

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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