what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

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It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

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how do we call a person with no body nor nose? a dead guy

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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how do you know if an asian gang has been to your house? 1. your computer is unplugged 2. your homework is finished 3. they are still trying to back out of the driveway

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Q: What's so special about my Ferrari? A: It was painted with babies

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One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

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what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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why did the man jump out of the plane without a parachute? Im not really sure, maybe to commit a slow and painful suicide.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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What do you call a black man that works with out pay? A volunteer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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