Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

knock knock Dave's not here.

What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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