Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

Why did the man cross the road? To get to the homeless shelter.

A chicken crossed the road. It was run over before reaching the other side. by fast asleep

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

Want to hear a funny joke Rojo Bunchie

Black people.

Knock knock Come in

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

What do you call a burger made from children with Aspbergers? Cannibalism

what do u say to a man walking down the street nothing, u shouldnt talk to strangers

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips and falls violently.

The turd said crazy turd so many cows have ninety two ears and it walked away to the store and drank doors while juggling feces and racist jack-o-lanterns.

Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, the answer is to get to the other side, but this is an anti-joke site so I don't know why as it can't be it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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