A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's funnier than the holocaust? Just about everything seeing how the holocaust is not a funny event, but rather enormous tragedy.... Assholes.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A boy with red hair is happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "I was born with an extra chromosome."

thumb_up thumb_down +25

You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops