Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

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Why could the red heading boy sing higher notes than the blonde headed boy? He was castrated at birth.

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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Three mexicans walk into a bathroom they all had to go pee.

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Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

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Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

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once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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compardre No Pew.. Pew.. At mi OINK.. OINKs...

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why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops