A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

whats worse then being a black kid with out a father? is not that bad it happens all the time

Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

Why did the Gay person fall down? He got shot.

Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

Do knock-knock jokes apply to homeless people?

what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

minorities

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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