Why does Billy Mays yell? He doesn't, he's dead.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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have you ever tried Ethiopian food? neither have they

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Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

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How are you doing today? I'm fine...Except for the rape.

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What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and his problem is destroying his family.

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How do you make a black man sad? Kill his entire family.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

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Sharvil has aids 4 times

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I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the red-haired barber say to the father who abandoned him at birth? Nothing. The father sat to the side and read a magazine as the barber cut the hair of his legitimate child, failing to recognize the irony of the situation.

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All of the people in the burning building escaped except for one what was wrong with that one person? He was a blind, could not hear and was in a wheelchair.

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Roses are red Violets are... The poem was never finished due to the fact that the reader had narcolepsy and promptly fell asleep.

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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why did Helen Keller cross the road? she didn't, she wasn't able to find it

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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Why was the man so hungry? Because he hadn't eaten in days.

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Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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