what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

Why didn't Anne Frank ever leave the attic? She did.

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm wearing pants and I'm hungry

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like rhymes Penis

A woman leaves the kitchen.

three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

rocky is staring at us from outside...

Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the world. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

What do you call a blonde with a broken arm? A cripple.

What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

Why did the boy cry? His Parents died.

A group of Germans eagerly await the FIFA football rankings. England is fourth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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