Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

women sports....

A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

Cleveland winning something

There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

dont you love porch monkeys? no.

Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

What did the girl say to the other girl? Nothing. She got hit in the head with a pineapple

What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

what did the murderer say to the man... i'm going to kill you

What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

You know what's a joke? Something Funny

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

How are a cow and a wall the same? They both go "moo". Except for the wall.

The real reason you go to college is.... To learn more about what you want to do in life.

I hate it when I get an erection and it pushes Pluto out of orbit.

Where do you find a vegetable? Where you left him

While your reading this. A man is robbing your home and sodomizing your dog

Q: In 2900 A.D, why did the stars started blasting at each other and exploding? A: Because it was the time for "Star Wars".

Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...