- knock knock. - Who's There? - Steve. - Steve who? - Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

Friends are like potatoes - when you eat them they die.

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

why did the plumber start to cry? his family died

What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

Miškinis gerai prikolina.

How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

meh

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

Why could the little girl not swim? She had rabies.

what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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