What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

WHATS A SHIT HOLE MOUNTNORRIS !!!!!!!!!!

Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?"

what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

What is the difference between a duck and a cow? One is an aquatic fowl and the other is a farmland mammal.

A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Why did the maths book commit suicide? It wanted to be history

Uh Oh you just fell, So, So I've got one thing to say to you, And what's that Don't fall it gets you down!!!!!!!!

Why didnt the boy eat his ice cream? Because he is dairy intolerant

why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was shot. why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one. why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? it thought they were playing a game. why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? it thought it was a koala. why'd the man fall of his bike? it was hit by 3 koala's and a refrigerator.

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

bill goes to the room.. why? to fing a broom riddle boz full of burtiouse.

How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

What did the chicken say to the butcher? Moo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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