- Anti Joke

If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

What did the devout Catholic man say to his gay neighbours who just got married? "Congratulations!"

Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

yo momma is so fat that she got diabetes and lost her legs

So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red

Her tits are so big that they would provide adequate nourishment for any future offspring.

Roses are red, Violets are violet. The man who wrote this, Was high as shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Triceratops

whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

John Cena for president

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.