Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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If i open this door you can go trough it

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

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How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

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Once there was a frog. My parents died.

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Jason's Wife said to him I love you before I left to head to work, Jason then went back inside to see no one was there and he remembered his wife died in 2009.

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I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

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How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

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Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to perform non-voluntary sexual acts against him.

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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YOU

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Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

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whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

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Papa Smurf: Why did the chicken cross the road? Grouchy Smurf: I hate chickens!

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why did josh pick up the quarter because he's a jew

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i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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