Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

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Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

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What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

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Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

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What do a Mexican, and American, a black guy, and an Asian all have in common? Believe it or not, they all like cantalope.

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Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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Katy Perry

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Rick Santorum 2012

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Q: why did the train not make it to the station? A: it crashed and killed everybody on board.

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A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

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What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

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"i see", said the blind man ... ...to his deaf wife... ...while his crippled children jumped for joy....

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An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

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Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

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Whats better than Anti-jokes? Mtiscape.com

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

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What's worse than an anti-joke about an anti-joke? The Holocaust

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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Women's rights.

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Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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