what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

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A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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-Knock, knock. -Who's there? -The pest control guy. -Please leave me alone I'm giving birth.

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What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Through forceful action.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

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women's rights, lol

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You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

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Two Black Males walk into a bar. A white old lady leaves cautiously. Everyone else stays and has a great time with them as they are actually two very good guys, and funny too.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

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Q: what is white and can't climb trees? A: A refrigerator

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"We wear pink on Wednesdays"" -Mean Girls, 2004

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A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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