Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a bar, purchases a beer, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happens, when you give a blonde a Computer? She uses it like any other person because her haircolor has nothing to do with her Intelligence

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Wii.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo mama is so fat she died

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A.One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a human.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops