Why did the chicken cross the road? A man held him at gunpoint and threatened to kill his entire family.

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Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

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A young boy walks into a catholic church, he attends mass, and leaves.

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Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

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Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

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Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know either, i'm just wondering why a chicken is trying to cross the road!

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what do you call it when justin beiber makes a sex tape with selina gomez? lesbian porn.

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Q: Why did the fork cross the balloon? A: Apples

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why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

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Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

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An Arabic Muslim is on a plane. He's flying to Chicago.

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a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

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Hey whats sad about 4 black people going over a cliff in a cadillac. Nothing

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A man breaks into your house points a gun at your head and proceeds to fire a blank... The man stares at your for another minute before jumping back out of the window he crawled in from and sitting on the curb outside your house rethinking his life choices.

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Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

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whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

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Yo mama is so fat that her belly button reaches the door 15 minutes before she does- by Adam Chebali

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Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

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Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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How do you kill a cancer patient? Throw a fridge at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops