Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

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A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said, "No change. He's likely to die, too."

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Why is the fat kid on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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Throw your crépe right into an ocean Where an octopus can get it in all the commotion With the crépe and the ocean and the oc-to-pus

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

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Where do 5 gay guys go????? One Direction.

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Why was the man bad at football? - he is chad henne

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Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

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What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with a pool table? I don't know.

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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Did you hear about the alter boy that wasn't molested by a priest?

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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Your mom was so fat, She was overweight.

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

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Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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