Dick in your vagina fuck cock cunt shit

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Q: what's blue and kills you when it falls from the sky? A: a whale no shit

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Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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Q: what do you call a black priest A: Coley s**t

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Knock Knock. Did someone outside the front door just say "Knock Knock"?

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

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Why did a vampire climb Mount Everest in the middle of the night on his birthday in September?

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colorblind

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

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dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

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What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

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Again, what is it called when you are safely inside at winter your power is out, but the streets are full of people as the weather gets really bad and people start bouncing around? Blizzard Entertainment. What is it called when a robot lets out gas? Electronic fArts.

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What do you call a man who was just struck in the head with a bowling ball? An ambulance would be the most appropriate thing to call since this man just sustained a serious head injury and medical responders should be contacted, lest his brain start hemorrhaging.

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What happens when you have nothing to do and you can't think of a joke? You just type whatever you want and hope to god someone likes it.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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mark lawson likes boys

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are many things that could be considered worse than finding a worm in one's apple. In addition, the matter of better or worse depends upon the point of view of the person in question, so what is worse than finding a worm in one person's apple may be preferable to finding a worm in another person's apple.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

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What do you call a girl with 1 eye and 3 arms... Chernobyl.

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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What do you get if you cross an Irishman with a Brazilian Aristocrat? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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