If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

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A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

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Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a piece of toast.

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How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

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What did the woman say when she didn't finish her meal? Can I get a to go box

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Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

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Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

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Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

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Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

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How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

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What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops