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How do the Kardashians change a light bulb? They buy a new mansion

your social life.

If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

Why do black people love watermelon and fried chicken? Honestly who doesn't? Duh! Because most people do! Moral: Not so sure about the coolaid though...

A drunk man is that last one inside a very popular bar. He passed out on the counter before he ordered a drink. The bartender is angry at a sale lost, which would have been his millionth sale before closing time on the 1000th day of business. He goes home and hangs himself.

What is worse than the Holocaust? Women's sports

Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

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I don't find blind jokes funny. Honestly, I just can't see the humor in them.

what did chloe say to alexis? you took my phone

What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich? A sandwich doesn't scream when I put my salami in it.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

A small plane is flying across the Atlantic Ocean, on board there's a Black Guy, a Jew, a Priest, and a Mexican. The plane has engine failure and needs to crash, but luckily there are enough parachutes for everyone. The evacuation is succesful.

1: I know a lot of people hate Mondays, but my least favorite day of the week is Thursday. 2: Can I ask why? 1: Of course you can. Everyone has free will.

A man with no face walks into a bar, another man sees this and promptly asks "Sir, why do you have no face?" The first man says nothing and walks away.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Everything I did, Was just a mistake like you.

Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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