Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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Why did a Monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

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What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

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What does Snoop Dogg eat when he's sick? Chicken Noodle Snoop.

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How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

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When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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Row, row, row your... Canoe.

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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What's the difference between a Watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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