How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jahova's witnesses.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy... but loose my number and keep the baby LOL

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I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

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What is black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Scenario: Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub The first one says, "Hey, can you pass the radio please" And the second one replies, "Sorry, my cousins are made of soap."

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What is the difference between a black man and a burnt pizza? -Nothing there both black.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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A man walks up to another man and asks what time it is. He then replies " It's 2:00" The man then pulls out a sandwich and eats it

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There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

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sometimes when im bored i dress in white pour water on the ground and roll around in it and pretend im a papertowel

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

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roses are red violets are blue i have candy im about to rape you

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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Yo mamma's so short that she is 12 inches below the average height of a woman at her age.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q2: Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2: It was nailed to the first one. Q3: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3: Peer pressure.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Why did the chicken cross the road... so people could keep asking that question for 4000 years

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

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Church.

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There was a two car pile up at wal-mart. 50 mexicans were killed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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