A baby seal walks into a club.

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The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

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What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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what the difference between Obama and osama bin laden nothing

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when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will both fall over after being hit multiple times with an ax.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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What is so bad about a black jew. They have to sit in the back of the gas chamber

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A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

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Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

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Knock knock. Who's there It's Jim O ok come on in

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

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A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

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-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

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What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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