i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

Christianity

<=3 penis

Question: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Answer: Being raped by a giant scorpion.

A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

TRENT EGENLAUF IS a LITTLE BOY

What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

Roses are red Violets are... The poem was never finished due to the fact that the reader had narcolepsy and promptly fell asleep.

What do you call a clock that has no sense of time? .....Broken.

How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, speaking to a bird would have been considered highly irregular, bordering on insane. He left the bird alone, until the time came to slaughter the bird and take it's nutritious meat.

Wanna Hear a joke.... Corey Jacobs is a FAT ASS

why was 6 jealous of 7? 7 had a huge dick.

What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

Q: Why did the duck eat some grass? A: because we are so careless that we caused global causing the entire pond to shrink to a size where it cannot raise a family and the fish could not prosper so the duck could not eat what it had forcing it do consume an inedible substence causing it to die because is not a natural part of a ducks diet

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

What did the little boy with no arms get for cristmas? A football.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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