What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

Whats small and has Aids? Avery..

knock knock whos there? jim okay come in.

What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

Q. I'm not hot, I'm not cold I'm not young, I'm not old I'm not lame, I'm not cool I'm not smart, and I'm not a fool. What am I? A. Text

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

What is similar between women and puzzles? Neither had the right to vote before 1920. Puzzles still don't

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance cocvered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being deined coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be covered." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

i love weed i fuc king really do i fuc king love smoking weed with you.And i love a fat spliff and i love a fat bong why cant we all just sing along!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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