In Soviet Russia you drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -30

If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down -32

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's half of 8? o

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the black man say to the white man? "I like your shirt" The black man walked off and lived out the rest of his days in peace.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's the difference between a murdered baby and a dead baby? Not much

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Armando masturbated

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

DARK FACT: A ratchet black chick would say that was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One holds groceries and the other molests little children.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

...............................................................hi

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did the boy with no srms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's the biggest Jenga game? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops