A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

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my mom died because she was morbidly obese

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

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Tunechi

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A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

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Why didn't the boy drop his ice cream He was hit by a bus and he wasn't eating ice cream

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

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Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

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YOU

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Why can't helen Keller read? She's dead.

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? They were both once alive and innocent, I lied about the black guy.

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

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What's worse than a stain on your carpet? Two stains on your carpet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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