What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Earlier that morning the farmer's daughter had inadvertently left the gate to the yard open as she was preoccupied by her worry over a maths test set for that day. She hadn't studied for the test as she was still deeply distressed over her fathers recent heart attack. This, coupled with the added burden of household chores now delegated to her because her mother was out trying to get the west field prepared for sowing, had made her quite forgetful and distracted of late. Whilst several chickens escaped, only one strayed so far that it actually encountered the road facing the farm. After crossing the road and gorging itself in a soy-bean crop, the chicken was struck by a furniture remover's van as it attempted to make its way home. Several hours later the dead chicken was spotted by a Community Mental Health Worker who was doing his bi-weekly rural clinic run. The chicken, being a bantam, caught the eye of the Mental Health worker, who was a keen trout fisherman. "Cool" thought the mental health worker- "those feathers will make for excellent trout flies". He stopped and plucked a handful of the most iridescent blue, green and orange feathers and placed them in an envelope. He rolled himself a cigarette, sat on the trunk of his car and admired the clouds. "God, I love this job", he muttered to no one in particular.

Q: What did the Big Bad Wolf say to Little Red Riding Hood? A: Nothing, wolfs are mentally nor physically capable of talking

What did the priest tell his son? Nothing, priests can't have children.

Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

why did the computer crash? it didn't

CRY

ring ring,Who is? you'r face.you'r face how?you'r but hole face.

Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

Roses are, blue, Violets are red, Screw poetic forms, I wish you were dead

What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

Yo mama is so fat she could be a plus size model because she's big and hot.

A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

How many Nazis does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Their domestic handiness was not impeded by their warped sense of entitlement and racial superiority.

A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

Girls get fucked Boys fuck Gays puke

Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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