What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

Q:Why did the boy cry? A: because his mom was hit by a bus Q: why did the boy wipe his face? A:he was covered in his mother blood and threatened all the witness who saw him push his mother into the bus

roses are red. violets are violet...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

Transgenders! More than meets the eye! Transgenders! Girl was once a guy! LGBTs wage the battle to destroy The homophobic forces of Christianity! Transgenders! Homos in disguise!

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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