A Jewish man, black guy, and asian all walk into a bar. Can you guess which one got arrested? That's right, the criminal

s o m a a d i t u n y s n i t a c s d c ' s k h k s t o e l y e

There was a hundred dollar note lying flat on the ground. The homeless guy didn't pick it up and walked on because he didn't see it.

Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Never mind

Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

boo

Who saw 9/11 as a miracle? The undertakers

A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

sky's the limit said the tree a.w. j.p.

Q:what word starts with "p" and ends with "orn"? A: popcorn

How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

Roses are gray Violets are gray ROFL I'm a dog

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have alzheimer's Bacon

kcuf read it backwards

A Mormon bishop, a Jewish Rabbi, and a Moslem Imam all died on the same day. They went to hell because they thought their good works would save them.

Two elks were out flying one day. One of the elks turned to the other one and said: - You have a cinnemon bun in your eye. - What? - You have a cinnamon bun in your eye! - WHAT? - YOU HAVE A CINNAMON BUN IN YOUR EYE!!! - I CAN'T HEAR YOU, I HAVE A CINNAMON BUN IN MY EYE!

The person below me is weird.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like trains (:

potatoes

goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...