How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

No.

How do you drown a blond? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

what has four wheels and opens using a key? -a trunk on wheels

Chinese drivers.

Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

Who thinks amy mc quire is really stuiped

Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

What is more worse than death? Death

What did the hungry man do? He ate.

Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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