- Anti Joke

What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

A man is walking with a boy through a swamp. The boy says to the man, "I'm scared." The man says, "You think you're scared, I have to walk out of here alone."

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you've been denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

What do you call a black priest? Someone devoted to the word of god

What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

Rigo your a stupid ass

what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What has two legs, but cant walk? Steven Hawking

what do you call gingers ugly.

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

Curiosity killed the cat! No, the tire of a vehicle did.

This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

donald................duck for president

what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

How much wood would a woodchuck chu... Forget this, this is overused.

What did the Jewish man say when he answered the phone? Hello?

1: Ask if I'm a truck. 2: Uh... Are you a truck. 1: No.