What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

Knock knock whos there? Its me, your doorbell is obviously broken Okay, hold on a sec. Please hurry up, its really cold I cant seem to find my key Its probably on the coffeetable, where you always keep it. No, its not there Check the floor underneith Oh, right, there it is.

how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

Why did the man fall down? Because he was pushed of a 5 story building

How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

a man shoots his mother in-law He his charged with murder and will only be eligible for parole in 18 months

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a girl who was knocked off a swing by a fridge.

Fishing rods are cool This haiku does not make sense Lumpy Space Princess

Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

Roses are flowers Violets are flowers

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

Knock Knock Who's there? the mailman.

I honestly have no idea what is upsetting you, why would I lie about my name? Please don't leave, you do remember me don't you? Can I call you over?

whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

What goes good with coca cola? Thirst

my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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