what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

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What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

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Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

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What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

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What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

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Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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My mom fell on our cat and it died.

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What did Einstein say to the blonde? 'What specific part of the theory don't you understand?'

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What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Victor. Victor who? Victor Secret, the gay door to door lingerie salesman. Can i interest you in a plastic cup holder?

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Your momma's so fat she died five years ago.

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Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had been used as an ingredient in kung pow chicken and was on it's way via delivery boy to the house that had ordered it for a lovely evening meal

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What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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