What did one ear say to the other ear? Did you hear that?

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Fuzzy Whuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Whuzzy has no hair. Fuzzy Whuzzy has Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

what do you call a fish with no eyes fsh

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Whats worse than finding a bad anti-joke on this website? Dieing of Genital Warts

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down +41

knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's after 9/11? 9/12

thumb_up thumb_down +37

ecks! why zee?

thumb_up thumb_down +37

how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops