Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

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Jewwy Jewstein

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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What do you call a black man running with a TV? A hard working individual who is in a rush to watch his new TV that he bought.

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There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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why did the computer crash? it didn't

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Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

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A jewish lady is cleaning a house to make some extra money. Its great that she can still find work in this economy.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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what did one tree say to the other? move over

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Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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heres a funny joke your momas so fat............

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Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

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Rick Santorum 2012

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What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops