What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

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A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Roses are red Violets are blue Vodka is less Than dinner for two

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knock, knock come in

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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What happens when you cross an Asian with a bass guitar? An Asian man lies down diagonally across a bass guitar.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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A Palestinian and an Israeli both board a plane at the same time. They exchange awkward glances and take seats at different ends of the plane.

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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knock knock Who's there? ... Hello?

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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So a mama tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato were all walking down the street. The baby tomato was falling behind its parents. So the daddy tomato goes back, squishes the baby tomato and yells ketchup!

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? The Batmobile only seats one, you'll have to take the bike Boy Wonder.

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Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

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How did Princess Diana cross the road? Through the windshield

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Q: whats pink and fluffy? A: Pink fluff.

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What's the opposite of stupid? diputs

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What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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