i like turtals and kids

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why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

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Timothy started school at an elementary and was in the fourth grade. His teacher was Ms Bradshaw, and he liked his class. One day as he was going into class, Ms Bradshaw asked everybody, "what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it?" Timothy raised his hand and said "the holocaust." The teacher went to her desk and pulled out a desert eagle and shot Timothy five times in the face and raped his dead body

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

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As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

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What happens when batman jumps off the top of a building? His fake wings fails and he dies upon impact of the ground.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

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Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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What is long and hard on a black man? First grade.

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Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

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HI MY NAME IS DOUG

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What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

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if bob has 400 pieces of chocolate and eats 200 chocolates how many does he have left. none he died from diabetes

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What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

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boobies oh boobies i how i love u boobies the are so juicy with milk and hairy with in the tities

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What do you call a gay Mexican guy who is deaf, has no arms, no legs, and is bald? Whatever his name is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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